Holiday Spirit

The holidays are upon us and I find myself in uncharted territory.  

My oldest son was a November baby so the first Christmas after his birth was more exciting for my husband and me than for him. In fact, our little guy slept most of the way through the opening of presents and the usual Christmas morning festivities.  

Last year, we had to spread the opening of presents over three days. As a 1-year-old, the first toy opened was the one he wanted to play with. And of course, we have dealt with the “box is more fun than the toy” issue, too.

This year, it is a whole new ball game. He knows what presents are and how to open them. He has a longing to see what is under all the bright paper and pretty bows.

And he knows which gifts under the tree are his because just in time for Christmas, he has learned how to recognize his name when it is written on something. Inevitably at least a dozen times a day, he comes up to me with a package from under the tree and looks at me with his big blue eyes, and so sincerely asks, “Open, please.”  

I am so pleased that he has such great manners that it makes it very hard to tell him he has to wait until Christmas. Especially since he is of the age that time is an abstract concept and waiting till Christmas is like waiting for the next millennia. It makes me wonder if Santa will put me on the “naughty list” for not acknowledging my son’s impeccable timing to be polite.

When I watch my family and friends with their older children, Christmas takes on a whole new meaning. Christmas is not a day waited for with innocent and eager anticipation, but a bartering tool. Santa is not the jolly man with an oversize belly, but a person that will only come if children live up to an almost unrealistic standard of behavior.    

This has begun to trouble me, mostly because I know next year we will most likely be in the same situation with our children, or at least one of them.

And then I remember when I was a child. My parents used Santa from about Halloween on as a way to keep my siblings and me well behaved. I can’t say it kept us out of trouble. It just made us more aware of the importance of keeping our indiscretions well hidden.  

So, this is what I have learned about the holiday season both through my own childhood eyes and now as an adult:

• First, you are doomed to have children that act as you did.  Thank God I was a little angel…right.

* Second, the holidays are the most difficult part of the year.  Not because of the weather or the enormous pressure we place upon ourselves to shop for all the right gifts, but finding that this means misleading your children which is one of the hardest things to do.

• Third, material gifts are no match for the time spent together and the love shared between family and friends.

• And last, no matter what happens, Santa doesn’t really bring coal. This is just a tall tail parents use as bribery.

So, kids and adults alike, enjoy the holiday season no matter what you celebrate or don’t celebrate. Remember the most important thing is not how many gifts you get or what you give, but who the gifts are in your life.

Family and friends and all the love you give them and they to you in return is truly the most precious gift.

Former radio personality Carey DeBeaux, who  grew up in Rio Rancho, is now raising two sons with her husband Tim. Her column on family life will appear on a regular basis. Click here to contact her.